16 Surprising Habits That Could Be Ruining Your Connection Behind Closed Doors
Keeping the connection strong in a relationship isn’t always easy, and sometimes, little things can start to create distance without you even noticing. If you’ve been feeling less connected to your partner, there might be a few reasons why. Everyday stress, communication issues, or certain habits can quietly impact your bond over time. The good news is that identifying what’s causing the disconnect can help you take steps to rebuild your intimacy. Here are some common factors that might be affecting your relationship.
Note: The content of this article does not reflect the writer’s personal beliefs.
Phones
How can you even start to get intimate if most of the time you spend in bed, you’re both starting at your smartphone checking your social media pages? Make it a rule to leave your phones outside of the bed. Plus, this will have significant repercussions on your sleeping patterns, too.
Stress
More often than not, intimate rejection has nothing to do with you. For instance, stress may decrease libido. Ask your lover whether he or she has been feeling stressed lately, maybe because of work or the kids. Spending time on relaxing activities, such as giving each other a nice massage, may help you regain your intimacy.
Sleep Deprivation
Tiredness is also often associated with a lack of intimacy. Most people experience difficulties in enjoying sexual intercourse when feeling sleepy. You surely don’t want to get intimate with your partner when you only think of sleep. Make sure you both prioritize your rest, for instance, creating a bedtime routine.
Not Knowing Each Other’s Turn Ons
Do you know your partner’s turn-ons? While kissing may be enough for some people, others need extra support. Talk to your partner and figure out each other’s turn-ons. For instance, he may enjoy dirty talking, a pleasant perfume, teasing each other, or a sexy lingerie set.
Low Self Esteem
Low self-esteem can be detrimental to mental health in several ways. One of these is that it can disrupt your sexual health. For instance, you may convince yourself that your partner cannot possibly be attracted to you and, therefore, ignore his sexual advances even when they are more than clear.
Body Image Issues
Body image issues can also be related to a lack of intimacy. This is because your partner may think you are negatively judging him and, therefore, feel shy about showing himself naked. If your lover is not confident in his skin, he will never be able to enjoy sex. Working on body acceptance is the first step towards recovery.
Mismatched Libido
It’s quite rare for partners to have matching libido. More often than not, one of the people in the couple will have a higher sexual drive than the other. So, how can you deal with it successfully? As often, the answer is compromising. Try to empathize with each other and prioritize quality over quantity.
Rejections
If you rejected your partner in the past, chances are that it will be harder for him to initiate sexual intercourse again. The fact that he hasn’t shown sexual interest in you in the last weeks does not necessarily mean that he is no longer attracted to you. He may simply be afraid of rejection.
Lack Of Hygiene
Be honest with yourself. Could hygiene be a potential factor influencing your intimate time with your partner? Before trying an approach, always be as clean as possible. Nobody likes being intimate with someone covered in sweat. Take a shower – maybe together! – and put some lovely perfume on if your partner likes it.
Kids
Becoming a parent is one of the most beautiful things that can happen in someone’s life. But it comes with some downsides, too. Lack of sleep and privacy can have a detrimental effect on your sexuality. Simply talking about this with your partner may help you find solutions.
Resentment
Is there any chance that your partner may be resentful towards you? Unsolved conflicts are often at the base of a lack of intimacy. If you have a problem, discuss it until you can both leave it behind. Avoid holding a grudge, and your sexual life will soon be back on track.
Bad Sex
How would you rate your intimate time with your partner? After years together, it’s normal to fall into the routine. Try a few things to spice things up, which may help you get your sexual life back; for instance, watch a sexy movie together or just flirt with each other again.
Fear
Unfortunately, many women may be scared when it comes to sexual intimacy. This may be due to several factors. For instance, you may be afraid that your partner is only using you, or negative past experiences may have shaped you. If you think fear is the reason stopping you from enjoying your sexual life with your partner, share these and consider seeing a therapist together.
Medical Conditions
Plenty of medical conditions may also prevent you from truly enjoying your intimacy with your partner. These can be anything from Parkinson’s disease, affecting people’s movements, to vaginismus, making penetration incredibly painful, and some mental conditions, such as depression and anxiety.
Lack of Communication
Communication is at the base of your relationship. If you feel that your sexual life is lacking, be open to discussing the issue with your partner. You will never be able to solve it unless you talk about it. On top of this, you should also be able to discuss what you enjoy, don’t enjoy, and would like to try without fear of embarrassment.
Past Experiences
Have one or both of you had an unfortunate or even traumatic experience with intimacy before getting into a relationship? Negative past experiences can cloud one’s confidence and make it challenging to be intimate with someone they love. Have open communications about past experiences so neither of you unknowingly hurt each other.
More For You
An excellent way to bring more sexual energy into your relationship is to start dating again. Why not invite your spouse out for dinner? Here are a few outfit ideas that will surely impress him.
This article was first published on the RB ITALIA Blog.
