16 Unexpected Behaviors That Could End Your Relationship Quickly
Relationships take effort, and it’s often the little things that can create bigger issues over time. Even if everything feels great now, certain habits or actions can slowly create distance between you and your partner. What seems like a minor thing today could build up and cause tension over time. Here are some surprising things that might affect your relationship more quickly than you’d expect.
Note: The content of this article does not reflect the writer’s personal beliefs.
Poor Communication
Learning how to communicate effectively is a must for long-term success. Always listen to each other and focus your conversations on feelings rather than actions. For instance, instead of saying, ‘You always ignore me,’ try with ‘I often feel ignored.’ This will prevent your partner from feeling accused and help you focus on the real issue.
Unspecified Boundaries
Always discuss your boundaries. For instance, how much time are you willing to spend together? How do you deal with your finances? Do you have any specific physical boundaries your partner should be aware of? Ensure you both know each other’s limits to avoid future conflicts.
Jealousy
Hollywood movies and Victorian novels often tend to romanticize jealousy, but there is nothing positive in this feeling. Is your partner controlling how you dress, the people you talk to, or the events you are allowed to attend? This controlling behavior shows a lack of trust and self-confidence.
Not Knowing How To Argue
Arguments are unavoidable in long-term relationships. Your goal is not to dodge them but to face them in the most respectful way. Don’t raise your voice; try your best to understand your partner’s perspective and see the problem as the common enemy. Always remember that you are not against each other; you are trying to solve the same issue.
Not Knowing Each Other’s Love Language
Do you have difficulty believing that your partner has feelings for you? This may be because you don’t know his love language. Some people show their love by expressing it in words, others by sharing their time with you, and some with physical contact. Understanding how your partner expresses his feelings for you is crucial to feel loved.
Losing Your Independence
Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you should stop doing the things you love the most. This is incredibly counterproductive in the long run. Losing your individuality means putting a massive burden on your partner’s shoulders, as he will be the only person responsible for your well-being.
Lack Of Common Goals
Sometimes, everything is absolutely perfect. You both love each other, and you are both respectful and independent… but guess what? Unless you have common goals in life, your relationship won’t last. Do you want to have kids? Do you both want to live in the same city? Do you want to get married? Make sure to discuss all of these before seriously committing.
Not Having Defined ‘Cheating’
Social media has completely revolutionized the meaning of ‘cheating.’ Can your partner follow other women he finds attractive? Can he text them? Can he keep his dating profile active? These are all issues that need to be discussed in advance to ensure you’re both on the same page.
Mismatched Needs
More often than not, relationships fail due to mismatched needs. For instance, you may want to spend more time together while your partner craves independence. Your needs and whether they are compatible or not will become evident only with time and may even change from one year to the next.
Taking Each Other for Granted
One of the fastest ways to hurt a relationship is by taking your partner for granted. When you stop noticing the small things they do or just assume they’ll always be there, it can lead to distance and resentment. Make sure to show appreciation and let your partner know how much they mean to you.
Secretiveness
Beware of people who claim they cannot share everything with you because they need to keep their ‘mysterious aura.’ While it’s important to respect each other’s privacy, high levels of secretiveness are often a red flag. This may be a sign that your partner is cheating or does not truly want to share his life with you.
Expecting Your Partner To Read Your Mind
We’ve all said at least once, ‘You should know why I’m angry.’ The truth is that, no. He should not know why you are upset. Are you frustrated because of something that happened between you two? Stop expecting your partner to read your mind and speak up.
Holding Grudge
Learning how to forgive is fundamental for long-term success. If you are still blaming your partner for something he did a month ago, he will soon grow tired of your constant accusations, and rightly so! We all make mistakes. The past is the past; stop bringing it back, or you may soon break up.
Addiction
Addiction is not only detrimental to your health but also to your relationship. If you’ve ever dated someone dealing with one, you know how hard this can be. Unfortunately, most people tend to underestimate how much addiction can affect their union, thinking they may be able to help their partner get out of it. The truth is that you can only help people who want to get helped.
People-Pleasing Behaviors
People pleasing is always wrong! Those with these tendencies tend to lie to avoid disappointing their partner but often end up causing even more harm. On top of this, these people have a hard time taking care of themselves as they always prioritize others, meaning that their mental health is often poor. For instance, they may experience intense guilt routinely.
Constant Bickering
Bickering may spice things up; however, if you never stop these useless fights, your partner will soon get tired of you. Is it truly necessary to throw a tantrum because your partner is five minutes late? Do you have to start an argument every time you disagree about politics? Learn to let go of what doesn’t really matter.
More for You
You now know what you should never do in a relationship. But what shall you do instead? Why not take the initiative and invite your partner out for a romantic dinner? Here are a few tips on how to come up with the perfect outfit for the occasion.
This article was first published on the RB ITALIA Blog.
