Couples Who Do These 12 Things  Often End Up Drifting Apart

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Trouble in paradise? Don’t worry; we’ve got your back. Romantic relationships aren’t the easiest terrain to navigate, but once you pick up a few habits and drop a few, you’ll have a good run in no time. Whether it’s midnight scuffles or unexpected disagreements, how you react throughout the course of the relationship defines how long it goes. So here are some habits that often push couples apart.

Glossing Over Negative Experiences

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We all experience trauma in some form or another, and the only thing that helps us move on is support. If you or your partner aren’t handling past experiences appropriately and simply glossing over them, you might be making each other feel insecure and unheard. It’s important to hear your partner out, no matter how repetitive it may be, to help them feel heard and wanted.

Avoiding Difficult Conversations

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It’s not only about avoiding glossing over negative experiences. You and your partner should be able to sit and have open conversations about complex topics. For example, if either of you is feeling unloved or unappreciated, you should be able to broach this topic without fearing judgment, humiliation, or anger from the other side. Avoiding difficult conversations will only distance you.

Not Being An Attentive Listener

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Sometimes, all we need is someone who lends us their ear. They don’t have to chime in, but just knowing they’re listening to our problems and genuinely understanding what we’re trying to convey is heart-warming. If you and your partner are talking but aren’t retaining much information, then it’s possible you aren’t being attentive, which can cause trouble.

Hiding Old Lies

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Sometimes, people lie about something menial at the beginning of a relationship and hide it, not expecting things to go far. But when the same relationship lasts, they never address the old lie because they don’t want to trouble their partner. But the longer you sit on a lie, the more problematic it becomes, especially if it’s revealed suddenly. Your partner won’t think the same, even if it was a menial white lie.

Maintaining A Lie

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Hiding an old lie is one thing, but continuing to lie about something is another. While it’s common for many people to panic and lie at the beginning of their relationship, it shouldn’t be normalized. If you’re actively spending time and energy in continuing and maintaining a lie, even if it’s for the sake of your partner, you’re really just prioritizing your feelings over their trust and love.

Not Being Intimate

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The lack of intimacy is a deal-breaker for many and most couples. While some factors and reasons like consent, health, and similar concerns validate the lack of intimacy, if you and your partner’s intimate life is taking a hit without any apparent reason, you need to address it. The longer you ignore each other’s intimate needs, the more doubt you create about your relationship.

Criticizing In Public

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Never air your dirty laundry. While we do understand that some disagreements come up abruptly, discussing your partner’s mistakes and expressing your disappointment in public is a bad look for both of you. Criticizing your partner publicly makes them feel humiliated and affects their reputation and social standing, which might be excessive, especially if you overreact.

Overcommitting Elsewhere

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Many workaholics struggle to maintain a healthy relationship because they overcommit at work. From pulling all-nighters to calling into work early, such workaholics might bring in the money but eventually end up losing precious loved ones because they never make the time. It’s especially easy to drift apart if you miss important events.

Holding Onto Grudges

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You’ll never progress in your relationship if you hold on to past mistakes and grudges. While it’s fun to be a little competitive, bringing grudges into a relationship is equivalent to outright declaring you’re no longer interested because it makes your partner feel undervalued and needlessly keeps them from feeling confident. If you can’t help holding onto grudges, talk to a professional.

Not Discussing Finances

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You and your partner might have separate finances, but this doesn’t mean you don’t discuss them at all. Discussing finances doesn’t necessarily mean being overridden with a decision; you and your partner can keep each other in the loop and discuss potential mutual purchases. This way, you won’t feel like you’re spending alone, and your partner won’t feel surprised by sudden or unexpected purchases.

Constantly Comparing Others

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Comparison directly affects a person’s confidence and makes them feel unwanted. You might think you’re comparing your partner’s appearance or skills to motivate them or be realistic (for example, saying your mom’s lasagna tastes better or that a neighbor works out more regularly), but you’re directly affecting your partner’s self-esteem and making them feel insufficient.

Being In Denial

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We all make mistakes, but if we’re not correcting them, we’re directly impacting our relationship. The lack of correction usually stems from believing you did nothing wrong; even if you feel like you’re in the right, you should evaluate your actions and behavior before taking a step. If you genuinely are in the wrong, then being in denial is only going to work out against your favor.

More For You

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Don’t let the minor issues ruin your relationship. If you notice any of these stress factors, talk to your partner and work on the problems together before they start to drift you apart.

This article was first published at Rbitaliablog.

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