14 Habits That Make People Feel Lonely and Push Others Away
Loneliness is the worst feeling. And while it’s certainly something we’ve all experienced at some point in our lives, it’s a feeling that should never be allowed to go as long as it does. If you’re feeling down in the dumps and lonely, you’re probably wondering why. Well, if you don’t want to end up lonely, then all you have to do is avoid these habits that push others away.
Constantly Complaining About Life
When you spend most of your time complaining about the mundane things around you, you lose perspective on what truly matters. Your perception of happiness becomes skewed, but it doesn’t only affect you; people around you get tired because you spend all your time complaining, which looks selfish and insensitive, especially when complaining about superficial and mundane things.
Constantly Comparing Things
Comparison steals joy. You spend most of your energy comparing your life with others, so you never appreciate the beauty of what you have. Comparisons aren’t only unhealthy for you but can also hurt people, especially when you rain on their parade by comparing your achievements. It’s also not a good look when you compare luxuries because you might be luckier than you think.
Overanalyzing Every Interaction
People dislike people who spend most of their time overanalyzing situations. Actions like comparing finances when someone pays the tab, pointing out wardrobe malfunctions, questioning someone’s decision, and outright calling out desires and dreams as unrealistic are why many people drift away from their friends and families. You might think you’re being helpful, but no one likes unsolicited judgment.
Avoiding Social Gatherings
Not all of us have it in us to go out all the time, but this doesn’t mean we stop getting out of the house altogether. People often make extroverts for attending too many social events, but these gatherings are a way to energize and reconnect with people. If you’re constantly avoiding social gatherings just because you don’t want to, you’re outright declaring your prioritization of staying home over people, which naturally doesn’t sit well with most.
Failing To Listen Actively
Nobody likes a friend who hijacks conversations and fails to listen to others. Friends reach out to others for support and guidance, but if they aren’t even getting a considerate friend who listens to them, they won’t feel supported and will eventually leave. If you feel like your friend group is dwindling, it might be because you’re not being an attentive listener.
Projecting Insecurities Onto Others
It’s never a good look when you project insecurities onto others. You might not even realize you’re doing it; to you, it might just be commenting or talking about something that you find concerning. But if you’re dictating how someone else’s experience is going to turn out based on yours or lashing out because of past trauma, you’re setting an unhealthy example and might be cut off.
Holding Onto Grudges
Sometimes, forgiving isn’t easy. But if you constantly latch onto others’ mistakes, especially if they’re small and forgivable, then you’re setting up your friendship for disappointment and failure. People who hold onto grudges have a hard time keeping friends because they always insinuate the worst about their friends and bring negative memories into the picture.
Caring Only About Yourself
Hijacking conversations is just the first tell-tale sign of a selfish friend. If you’re quick to hijack topics and divert attention to yourself or rarely go without talking about your day, you’re actively declaring that you only care about yourself. You need support and guidance, too, but if you’re directly impinging on others’ progress and ignoring their crises, you’re setting yourself up for loneliness.
Rarely Offering Help
Friends in need are friends indeed. But if your friends are the only ones pulling through in a crisis, you may need to look hard at yourself. You don’t have to help out all the time; just enough that your friends know you’re going to be there for them. But if you’re flaking on such opportunities and never giving a helping hand, you’re being selfish and inconsiderate.
Blaming Others For Loneliness
A person’s loneliness is often a direct consequence of their behavior and actions. It might not always be true, but displaying such habits is a sign you’re responsible for your loneliness. However, if you’re always blaming others, complaining about them not making time for you, and skipping meetups, you will only exhaust them and ironically drift apart.
Always Being Unreliable
You’re an unreliable friend if you’re always running late or can never hold up to your end of the bargain. Others often shun unreliable people because people are tired of covering up for them all the time. If you can’t even commit to basic tasks and events, you’re clearly not considerate enough of your friends and family’s needs.
Always Trying to Be Right
If you always feel the need to win every argument, people may start to keep their distance. Constantly trying to prove your point or refusing to admit when you’re wrong can make conversations feel frustrating and exhausting. Friends and family want to feel that their thoughts and opinions matter, not like they’re being corrected all the time.
Being Negative All the Time
If you always focus on the negative side of things, it can leave people feeling drained. Constant negativity can turn conversations into a downer and ruin the mood. While it’s normal to have bad days, always expecting the worst or pointing out what’s wrong makes it hard for others to enjoy your company. Try looking for the good things in life, too. When you focus on the positives, people will enjoy being around you a lot more.
Ignoring Feedback From Friends
Lastly, if your friends have frequently tried to address problematic behaviors, but you listen in one ear and out the other, you’re actively enabling your own loneliness. We control how others perceive and treat us, but ignoring constructive and friendly feedback creates an aggressive tone that no one will appreciate.
More For You
If you’ve loyal friends who are always there for you and don’t make you feel alone, then you’re lucky. Keeping your friends close will not only help you stay happy but also positively impact your health.
This article was first published at Rbitaliablog.
