17 Words and Phrases That Could Be Hurting Your Marriage

Marriage isn’t just a social contract; it’s a loving relationship between two individuals who learn to support and grow with each other. The words you say to your wife, especially during arguments or even as a joke, can have a bigger impact than you might realize. Certain phrases can hurt her feelings and affect your relationship in ways you don’t expect. To keep your marriage strong and make sure your wife feels supported, here are some phrases you should never say to her.

I Never Loved You

Being told by the person you love and hope to spend the rest of your life with that they don’t love you is like a dagger to the heart. This sentence can be devastating because it means your spouse doesn’t value or love you and conveys that they married you for reasons other than love.

I Am Done With You

This phrase single-handedly shakes the foundation of marriage to its core. Being told your partner is done with you implies no chance for reconciliation, even if it was spoken angrily or as a joke. It’s tough to move on from this phrase because it creates doubt, reduces confidence and self-esteem, and might sprout up in every moment of relaxation.

My Mom Is A Better Cook Than You

Many women cook for their spouses because they love it, but being compared to someone with decades of experience can shatter their confidence. Although we all have a soft place in our hearts for our mother’s cooking, comparing it and declaring it superior to your wife’s conveys that you will never be able to like her cooking style and will always draw comparisons.

I Wish I Never Met You

This is one of the most hurtful phrases and usually leads to irreversible psychological and emotional damage because it conveys that the entire premise of your relationship, even before marriage, was a sham. Your wife will spend every minute of the day questioning whether she is worthy of you and imagining scenarios about the two of you never meeting, so naturally, this phrase can be soul-shattering.

You Are Crazy

Although we all have moments of frustration, dismissing your wife’s emotions and opinions and calling her crazy or mad can have long-term effects. While your wife may get over being hurt momentarily, she will always return to this moment. It will discourage her from coming forward with concerns and feelings, emotionally displacing her position in the marriage.

I Wish You Were Like (Someone Else)

Being compared to your spouse’s ex is one of the most hurtful things. This phrase clearly implies that your spouse has not moved on from a past relationship and suggests that they might go back to them in a jiffy if they could. It also makes a woman question her place in the marriage, reducing her self-esteem and making her hesitant to approach you.

You Are Getting Fat

We won’t always remain as we are, and while we go through weight fluctuations all the time, being told you’re fat is equivalent to being told you’re unappealing. It’s especially hurtful if your wife is also a mother because pregnancy can have reversible and irreversible effects. It suggests you find your wife’s body unappealing and can shatter her self-esteem for a long time.

You’re Not the First Woman to Give Birth

Although pregnancy is a normal part of life, it varies from woman to woman. While some women’s birthing experience may be smooth as a breeze, others might struggle with unseen obstacles and health issues. Most women look to their spouses for support during this sensitive time, but being told they aren’t the only woman to give birth diminishes their feelings and birthing experience.

I Don’t Care

These words should never cross your mind if your wife comes forward with a specific complaint or issue. This will convey to her that you don’t care enough about her problems, suggesting that you might not even support her if things come to a halt. Additionally, being told your spouse doesn’t care can hurt you enough to stop approaching them with problems in the future.

What Did You Do All Day?

Although it might look easy, being a stay-at-home mom or wife can be challenging. Managing a household and taking care of children can be incredibly messy and emotionally and physically exhausting. Since this question directly insults your wife’s effort to maintain a household, it makes her feel small and incomplete and conveys that she is doing a lousy job.

Whatever

This small word can have devastating effects because it quickly diminishes a person’s feelings and halts conversation. It’s often seen as an insulting or hurtful word because it almost always stems from indifference and apathy. It conveys that you don’t care enough about your wife’s emotions or words to listen attentively.

I Hate You

Once you say these words, you can never take them back. Being told your spouse hates you is something you can never move on from because you’ll always question their emotions and sincerity, even in tender and intimate moments. Telling your wife you hate her will make her question her position in the marriage and your life.

You’re Just Like Your Mother

If you are arguing with your wife, this is a line that you should always steer clear of. It’s a one-way ticket to a damaged relationship, which will not be easy to fix. The remark is not only condescending towards your mother-in-law but also implies that your wife has inherited undesirable traits from her mother.

You’re Overreacting

Saying this can make your wife feel belittled and ignored. Everyone’s emotions are valid, so it’s important to acknowledge her feelings. Listen and try to understand where she’s coming from. Empathy goes a long way in maintaining trust and connection.

Can’t You Do Anything Right?

Saying this can really hurt her confidence and make her feel worthless. Instead, try to offer some constructive feedback and encouragement. Focus on what she’s doing well and how things can improve together. Everyone makes mistakes, and a little support goes a long way.

It’s Not A Big Deal

What seems small to you might be really important to her. Instead of brushing it off, try acknowledging her feelings and asking why it matters to her. Showing you care can make a big difference. Remember, being supportive strengthens your relationship and brings you both closer.

My Mom Wouldn’t Do It That Way

Dropping this line can really hit a nerve. It’s like telling her she’s constantly being measured against your mother, which can feel pretty unfair. Also, it could lead to some unnecessary awkwardness between her and your mom, making family dinners more tense than they need to be. It’s way better to appreciate her uniqueness rather than comparing to your mom.

More For You

Relationships aren’t always easy. If things are feeling strained with your spouse, it might help to identify these common stressors. Addressing them can lead to a healthier, happier marriage.

This article was first published at Rbitaliablog.