Stop Saying These 18 Harmful Phrases If You Want to Stay Happily Married

How we communicate with our partners can significantly impact our relationships. Sometimes, even simple comments can hurt more than we realize. To keep your relationship positive and respectful, it’s important to avoid saying things that might cause damage. Some common phrases may seem harmless but can actually do more harm than good. By avoiding these, you can create a stronger, happier relationship that can last for years to come.

“You Always…” Or “You Never…”

Complaining about your partner’s abilities or actions is never a good way to begin a conversation. Still, such phrases can inflict long-lasting damage, affecting your partner’s self-esteem. It also promotes a toxic idea: only one partner should adjust to the other’s requirements. It’s also an effective way to shut down any productive communication.

“That’s Not A Big Deal”

Communication is vital to a successful relationship. But if you diminish your partner’s concerns and feelings by saying such things, you’ll make them feel small, and they’ll eventually stop opening up. Ultimately, you’ll end the bridge of communication required for a healthy relationship and create room for resentment, fear, and disdain.

“Because I Said So”

When deciding, it isn’t unusual for one partner to question the other’s motives or purposes. However, a healthy relationship should have a healthy decision-making system. If you’re constantly stumping your partner’s curiosity and intrigue because you feel your choices and actions don’t deserve an explanation, you venture into controlling territory and can ruin the relationship.

“You’re Overreacting”

One of the most disappointing things to hear when you’re sharing a concern is being told you overreact. It takes a lot for partners to open up to each other, so hearing such statements can close off a person and make them fear opening up in the future. They’ll stop communicating, even if their problems are still there.

“Here We Go Again”

Many people like to mutter this when their partner brings up a topic or fight that was previously hashed out. While bringing up old arguments is not healthy, sometimes re-discussing them can create room for clarity and improvement. But being dismissive like this implies that you dread the conversation, making your partner feel small and afraid.

“My Ex Never…”

Perhaps the worst thing you can do is compare your current partner to your ex. While most of us have previously dated other people, it’s not classy bringing them up to compare with your current partner. It makes your partner feel insecure and will open up closed wounds. It will also impact their impression of you.

“You’re Lucky To Have Me”

This can be a pretty fun line when spoken in a cheeky mood, but it’s often spoken in moments where one partner wants to manipulate the other. Constantly reminding someone that you’re the best they could land is unsophisticated and rude; it puts you on a pedestal that creates unrealistic expectations, which can be exhausting for your partner.

“Why Can’t You Be More Like [Insert Name]?”

You don’t necessarily need to compare your partner to your ex to hurt them; drawing comparisons with people is generally hurtful. For example, compare your partner’s cooking with your mother’s or your partner’s ability to manage household tasks with your father’s. Comparisons imply that you’re unsatisfied with your partner and will gladly seek satisfaction elsewhere.

“I Don’t Need You”

Saying “I don’t need you” can really hurt your partner and make them feel insecure. It can create feelings of rejection and loneliness, which can strain your relationship. Instead, try to express your independence in a way that still shows you value and respect your partner’s role in your life. Let them know that while you’re capable on your own, you still appreciate and cherish their support and presence.

“You Think You Have It Bad?”

Often followed by “Let me tell you about my day,” this statement immediately diminishes your partner’s experience. While your partner and your exhaustion or level of satisfaction with the day might not align, outright dismissing their experience and comparing yours makes them feel unheard. It invalidates their feelings and closes them off to future discussions.

“You Wouldn’t Understand”

This statement is hurtful because most people want to understand their partner’s feelings and experiences. Suppose your partner tries their best to understand something traumatic or worrying, but you quickly dismiss them. In that case, they’ll eventually stop bothering you and won’t even consider checking up on you if things go haywire.

“Fine, I’ll Do It Myself”

We’ve all heard or said this phrase before. Often spoken out of anger or frustration, it usually precedes when one person takes it upon themselves to accomplish a task they initially asked someone else to do. But if you’re too quick to pick up things and retort like this, you don’t trust your partner enough to rely on them.

“All Couples Fight”

While true, this statement quickly dismisses the concerns or feelings that your partner is sharing with you. It’s natural for every couple to disagree, but that doesn’t mean you normalize fight culture. Constantly saying this when bickering prevents you from finding a healthy solution, causing all future fights without effective resolution.

“Just Forget It”

Saying this ends the conversation and leaves things unsolved. It tells your partner you don’t want to talk about it, which can build up resentment over time. When you just brush things off like this, your partner feels like their concerns don’t matter, which can hurt their trust.

“I’m Not In The Mood”

Saying this over and over without explaining why can make your partner feel rejected. You really need to share why you’re not in the mood, whether you’re stressed, tired, or something else. Being open about your feelings helps prevent misunderstandings and makes your partner feel more connected and understood.

“You’re Nothing Without Me”

This is one of the most toxic sayings because it strips a person of their individual worth in the relationship. It’s also a manipulative tactic used to exert power and superiority over a partner. Once you or your partner have said this, you might as well pull the plug on the relationship since it won’t be the same again.

“I Can’t Deal With You Right Now”

People often say this phrase when they wish to avoid a conversation, but in all honesty, it does nothing but close doors for open communication. It makes your partner feel like a burden. They may feel hesitant to open up to you in the future, thinking that their presence or problems are too much for you to handle.

“I Wish I Was Single Again”

Saying this to your partner is far more damaging than you may imagine. It shows that you are extremely dissatisfied with your partner and regret being with them. This is not only hurtful to your partner, but it plants seeds of insecurity that can grow into resentment and, ultimately, a divorce.